My Saddest Day

It all started when in at five past midnight
Now I am lying stiff and cold
Deep in troubled dreamless sleep.
Cotton wool stuffed in my nostrils,
I cannot breathe.
A rag tightening my jaws together,
I cannot protest.
My feet bound together,
Surely there is no escape this time round.

Granny chose they dress me up in my favourite suit,
But this time there will be no return journey.
My brothers have put me in a box,
I am on display in the Living Room.
Living Room, what am I doing in the room of the living?
But they cannot hear me,
Because I cannot speak.


I hate this fake smile plastered on my face by the mortician,
It makes my Maggie cry.
Besides, what’s there to smile at?
And what’s Maggie doing calling out my name?
Can’t she see that my ears are blocked with wool?
I cannot hear her.
Look at little Krystal;
Does she even know I will not be opening my door for her?
Not tomorrow. Not ever. Never. No more Deshi!
Even Simon is here and he is crying.
Are those tears for me or for the twenty
Thousand shillings that now I will never be able to pay back?
But at least he comes near me unlike Olive
She has chosen to day to be afraid of me.

I thought I was mush loved at my place of work;
Where is my boss and workmates taking this box that am in?
Oh my! Oh my! Its 4PM!
Time for me to begin that dreadful journey
Jack fruit trees and banana plantations.
I so hate this path,
Mother took it and never came even though it was so close to our house.
You don’t believe me?
Then what of Aunt Harriet, Aunt Eva and Aunt Bernadette?
Little brother Douglas and Maggie’s Henry;
They all never came back!
I hate this path. I hate it! I so hate it!

And this pit they are lowering me into,
I don’t even know these men.
Who are they and why are throwing me in a pit?
Now I know I don’t like this pit and I don’t like these men either.
Hey someone, Maggie, please stop them!
You know how much I fear darkness.
Don’t be fooled by the shallowness of this pit,
Its too dark and very deep.
They should not put me down there,
I will never come out!
I will never come back!

This is very strange,
Everyone is throwing dirt at me.
All because the priest said dust to dust and ashes to ashes.
He lied! I have never been dust or ash!
Everyone is wailing even the more.
Are they a bunch of hypocrites?
No, that’s how they show their love for me.

They all bid me farewell even though they don’t know where I’m going.
But Granny seems to know my destination,
She tells me to convey her regards to her faithful departed.
So I am now also departed!

Dressed in my favourite suit
On such a tearful day
And with my loved ones abandoning me in the lonely wilderness,
This surely is my Saddest Day!

- by Luyimbaazi Dennice Vadim

Mention my name when you recite this poem. Its a dedication to my parents and all my faithful departed., Mother

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